Letter to Doubt II

Hi,

We could not grow apart, could we? Nice to meet you, after a long, long time. You know, I was actually emerging a winner, bereft of any bit of you, day by day, moment after moment. But being smart and genetically wise, in whatever little that I am, I admit, I cannot deny your existence. I have grown, remember that. It took twelve fucking years for Leo to get that fucking Oscar, so yes, to get you out of the system, will take its own long years. 

Until then, I have decided to give you another chance, as opposed to you giving me one. Come, be with me and let's see me beat you. I will not remain quiet this time -- to give you that space to creep inside my skin and swallow my words, my thoughts. Do you know how it feels to sweep thick layers of shadows from the soul? Oh no, you don't. I have done it. It took me three decades to start believing in myself, and I am not allowing anything to come my way to contest that. 

I have seen too many characters shrouded in clouds and then becoming stories made of reality, fragrant of fantasy. Some remained, many downed. Not everybody can always remain a winner. But I am a sure survivor. I invite you to a duel, anytime, anyplace, and we will see who topples whom. It takes a whole lot of sobriety and genuineness to come to terms with one's own self, and now that I have touched upon that bit of me, I promise I am not letting go of her. She is protected, call it luck, call it love.

While all of this might not remotely sound a threat to you, but since you dared, this is my reply. Face me. Let us fight upfront and without masks. 

Intelligently, smartly.

Never yours any longer,

K.